I recently came across this on Facebook written by a Cambodian girl called Kanitha Kan and could really relate to it, i’m 33 and single and often am asked… but why? Well maybe it is because I don’t want to be with just some Raj, Ravi or Rahul. I have a choice! This post is dedicated to every woman who stands up for what she believes in and who has made her choices for herself:
Dedicated to girls
1. Not every girl wants to get married by 23. So before you ASSUME she’s of marriageable age, ask her what her views on marriage are. One hint, might save you the drama- just because she does not want to get married now does not mean she never will. She has other plans for herself right now, let her live a little.
2. Just because a girl wishes to do her PhD after Masters does not mean she doesn’t want to settle down in life. Give her a break, and respect the fact that she has the confidence to take that up, cos yeah, PhD is no joke. There will come a point when she would happily devote herself to her family, and balance it out with her work life. Her degrees, or lack of them, won’t make any difference. Let her study while she wants to, okay?
3. Just because she is 27 and unmarried does not mean she’s been rejected by many men. Maybe, being single is a choice she has made.
4. Having a boyfriend does not make her characterless.
5. Just because she has recently gone through a break up doesn’t mean she is vulnerable and available.
6. Just because most of her friends are boys, does not mean she is “having a good time” with all of them.
7. Just because she has a drink in her hand does not mean she is an alcoholic.
8. Just because she wore a short skirt to one party does not mean she dresses up that way every day.
9. Just because she is ambitious doesn’t mean she isn’t a family person.
10. Just because she doesn’t discuss her plans doesn’t mean she’s clueless about life. Give her a chance, alright?
11. Just because she is outspoken doesn’t mean she is a rebel.
12. Just because she comes home late from work does not mean she is sleeping around with her colleagues.
13. After a hectic week, give her some time to relax over the weekend. Don’t make that one weekend party make her look like a she’s a frivolous party-girl without a job.
14. Just because she is out shopping alone does not mean she is depressed or lonely. It’s how she relaxes, respect that.
15. Just because she is on a holiday alone does not mean she doesn’t have company. Maybe it’s a break to get back her lost confidence, or maybe that’s how she is. Admire her spirit instead of giving her advice, okay?
16. Just because she is a woman doesn’t mean she can’t kick ass in military school.
17. Just because she has a tattoo doesn’t mean she is attention seeking. Maybe that’s her way of expression.
18. Just because she doesn’t know how to cook doesn’t mean she won’t make a good wife. Remember when you were just married and cooked chicken curry which was um, a disaster?
19. Just because she likes everything pink and shiny and fluffy doesn’t mean she lives in her own world. She can handle some situations much better than her male counterparts.
20. Just because she is pretty does not mean she is a whore. And just because she is friendly does not mean she is flirting with you.
Yes, we cry, we are emotional; we take things personally, and sometimes over-react to situations. But this does not give any one the right to judge us in the wrong way. Times are changing; don’t confine her within those boundaries, no matter how orthodox you are. There are some who might be fighting this losing battle, yet compromising on their decisions and plans, just to please society.